Kamis, 07 Januari 2010

KETAKUTAN

pas gua lagi diem di depan komputer ga jelas,
tiba-tiba keingetan aja ama 1 lagu
lagu lama seh
judulnya "WHO AM I"
cuma selama ini gua ga pernah baca teksnya, cuma denger aja
tiba-tiba tadi Tuhan nyuruh gua buat baca lirik lagunya
OH MY GOD
ternyata keren banget
nyambung ama apa yang gua renungin akhir-akhir ini

kemaren mlm Tuhan negur gua
karena ketakutan gua akan segala hal itu terlalu berlebihan
gua takut buat gagal untuk kedua kalinya
gua takut memulai sesuatu yang baru
gua takut gua takut
tapi tadi mlm Tuhan cuma blg "jangan takut, percaya aja"
dipikir-pikir emang iya seh
ngapain gua musti takut

pas gua renungin alasan terbesar napa gua bisa takut itu karena
selama ini gua mikirin apa yang jadi bagian Tuhan
gimana kalo komsel ga bertumbuh, gimana kalo anak-anak komsel pada ilang
sebenernya kan yang ngasih pertumbuhan itu Tuhan
buat apa gua pusing2 mikirin apa yang jadi bagiannya Tuhan
bagian gua itu cuma lakuin apa yang Tuhan suruh

simple aja
kita itu harus kaya orang buta yang ga bisa liat apa-apa
untuk bisa berjalan orang buta butuh komando ato bantuan dari arahan orang lain
sama kaya kita
untuk bisa terus berjalan kita perlu arahan dan komando dari Tuhan
just listen and do it apa yang Tuhan suruh

nyambung ama lagu tadi
sebenernya semua yang kita lakuin bukan karena kita sendiri,
tapi karena Tuhan yang kita punya

Not because of who I am
But because of what You've done
Not because of what I've done
But because of who You are

keberhasilan sebuah komsel bukan hanya tergantung dari apa yang sudah pemimpin buat
tapi lebih dari itu karena ada Tuhan di dalam komsel itu
seorang pemimpin berusaha menarik hadirat Tuhan ke dalam komselnya
itulah tugas seorang pemimpin
hadirat Tuhan itu bagian Tuhan, kita cuma bisa berusaha menarik hadirat Tuhan itu
kadang kita cuma terfokus pada bagaimana kalo hadirat Tuhan itu ga ada di dalam komsel
heiii
itu bagian Tuhan
lakuin aja apa yang jadi bagian kita

jadi intinya
buat apa kita takut
kita punya Tuhan yang besar dalam hidup kita
Tuhan yang akan nunjukkin kita jalan ke mana kita harus berjalan
kita menjadi takut karena fokus kita bukan sama apa yang Tuhan perintahkan ama kita,
tapi kita berfokus sama apa yang menjadi bagian Tuhan

Selasa, 05 Januari 2010

i call it MIRACLE

I still remember my wish in my 21th birthday

I wish everything become better

but God said something else

I think it is not getting better but getting worse

I have lost everything in an instant

all I have built from beginning

I initially could not accept

I was disappointed and angry

every night I cry and blame myself

I feel to be the most sinful

but God said to me
to serve Me is not only for status, but because you love Me
I realized that I was wrong

I started to get up from my slump

and looked around me

there is still much more needs me

I began to understand the purpose of God

God made me experience it all for a particular purpose

so I learned to return to the original purpose of God

learn from my mistakes yesterday to rise people who are more extraordinary than them for God

when I lifted my hand, God worked amazingly in my life

He brings me meet an extraordinary girl in magical way

I always call it a miracle

Senin, 04 Januari 2010

go away

yesterday I did love you
yesterday I really want you
yesterday it was all the things you are to me
but it was only yesterday
before you get away from me with no reason
I try to survive keep my love for you
but I'm very tired
I think we are too far apart
I'm here and you are there
i think it's enough for me

now it's time for me to get up and go away
thanks for everything

Senin, 21 Desember 2009

counting time towards the end of the year

counting time towards the end of the year
huaaaa
I am so excited to welcome in the year 2010, year of EMPOWERMENT

new year
new hope
new faith

This made me reflect that there are so many events that I have spent during the year 2009
either bad or good events
thank God for an extraordinary ENCOUNTER "getting God's vision"
I actually saw the mercy of god in ENCOUNTER
thanks for all God has entrusted to me

this year God has made me strong when I have to lose everything I've built from zero
but much can I learn from this event
"I serve God not because the status, but because I love my God"

but I enjoyed every existing process
I always try to thank every event that I experienced
I am grateful to have a great and a big GOD in my life

I am very grateful to the most important people for me this year:
# Ka Franz & Ka Chiqa
#Andre, Jejes, Yogi, Aldy, Siska
#Kharisma, Nando, Acha, Lulu, Keke, Gun, Dea, Risye, Jojo (and all the Angela's areas that I can not mention one by one)
#Rina Melisa M and Alexander Anugrahputra (my luphly daughter and her dad.ahahahha)
# and the last to someone (you were one of those close to me in this year.ahahahha)



I am very thankful for your prayers,your cares, and your covers for me

and the last I just wanted to say that I want in the next year we will still be together
walking together as a FAMILY to serve GOD
I believe next year will be more extraordinary than this year

let's end this year with thanks
cos GOD is GOOD all the time

see you next year

love you all,

-tashaluphs-

Rabu, 16 Desember 2009

i can't survive anymore

someone told me,
if you want to forget someone
put all about that person into the box
key that box
throw that key as far as possible
and put that box deep inside your heart

let the box still in your heart
without having to open it again


I have been trying to survive with your attitude
but now i can't survive anymore
I am not as strong as you think
sorry
I had to put all of our memories into that box that I would never go back


if you want me to back i promise, you will never find me to back

Selasa, 10 November 2009

hikz..hikz..

just need a shoulder to cry
achaa, i need you
hikz.hikz.hikz

Senin, 09 November 2009

091109

Sometimes I feel so alone
I call your heart, but there’s no one at home
Taking a toll on my pride
I’m reaching out, but there’s no one inside
You know it doesn’t feel right

When I look in your eyes
I know love is blind,
but the heart doesn’t lie
I’ll ask one more time
Maybe this time you’ll try

So tell me boys
“What deep in your heart?”

Boy I care about you
I’m there for you
So why don’t you care for me
like I care about you?


I spend like all of my day
Trying to sense out just how thing got this way
I though that we were in love
But I swear right know
I don’t know what you want.

I make sure that I give you quality time

But lately,
I feel you’re not home by design
But still I’m gonna try
To give you the love of my life
In hope that you,
that you will open up your heart

Sometimes I’m not sure that
that I am all you got
sometimes I’m not sure you love me or not
just one thing that I’m certain of
Boy, I care for you
And one thing that I want is
You care for me too